Numbers

Okay many of you might be wondering did I lose 13lbs over night?! No I didn't lose it over night but I have lost 21lbs total over the last 10ish months (it was 23 until I weighed myself this morning - boo!). I decided today to change my starting weight to the 194 which was my heaviest vs the 178 which is what I started at on MyFitnessPal a month and half ago. That is what changed the number you see on the right hand side. This is a long journey not one I just started so I decided to show and be proud of the total number!

I have been embarrassed of the 194 number for a long time now. It's not like I haven't shared it, you can find my fist post that I was truly honest with myself and everyone - "Behind the Issue(s)". Even though I have put it out there I haven't really embraced it and taken ownership of the number 194 where I started. Yesterday I decided to embrace that number, 194, and be okay with it. It is not something to be ashamed of at all. No number is, no matter what it is; if you can take ownership of it and responsibility that you are the one that got there and you are the one that can change it no number is shameful.

The key there is taking ownership and responsibility - knowing that it is your doing and no one elses, not blaming anyone but yourself then you can do something about it. That is what my blog is all about, being Honest with myself, being honest with my family, my friends, and others. I can't truly be truthful if I don't accept the past, acknowledge the past and take full responsibility. I know I let myself slip and didn't take care of myself the way I should have. I use to snicker at some of the retired swimmers when they would come back and would have gained a bunch of weight - yes I know it's terrible but true, and I always said I would never let myself slip, that I would get my butt into the gym and eat right. Ya I definitely didn't do that. It is a lot harder than said, but the fact is I was a hypocrite and I do apologize for for making fun of them. I guess it was payback huh!?! hahaha!


So this morning is weigh-in day. I was excited to get onto the scale because yesterday was a killer work out day for me! I burned 1205 calories yesterday - 409 calories on the elliptical for a 5K, a mile on the treadmill for 124 calories, 155 calories for circuit of military presses, woodchops and abs, and 517 calories swimming for 40 minutes. I ate a good dinner to make sure and replenish my body and even treated myself to 2 beers since I was out at a bar with some friends playing trivia. Nothing crazy. I get on the scale this morning and it is 172.8. :(  I was 172.4 last Thursday (missed Wed) and then 171.0 on Sunday. I am really bummed about the increase because I am working so hard. What happened? Oh well I guess I will just have to keep working that much harder and next week hopefully will be a lower number! MFP (MyFitnessPal) even told me when I hit complete the day that I would weigh 158lbs after 5 weeks of exact days like yesterday. That is the lowest it has ever told me so with that I really was excited about the scale. The only thing I can think of is the sodium did spike at dinner, maybe that was it? What I do know is I will not let this ruin my day and will keep going strong!